What Are We Searching For?

 I look at The Mudroom’s search terms every day. I love seeing how people find us, and what they’re looking for. It helps us discern what the need is so we can determine the direction we should take. We wanted to share the top 3 searches that brought visitors to us. It says a lot about where our minds are, what our hearts are struggling with, and how much we crave understanding and company along the way.

The most searched terms drawing people to The Mudroom were, in some form or another: anger, sexually broken, and losing your faith. The majority of our readership is female, even though we have some faithful male readers, like Patrick Bowman and Glenn Kaiser. Thanks, guys!


None of us are immune from anger. Righteous or unrighteous, it leaves us feeling out of control and ashamed. The more it happens, the harder it is to resist. My friend Lisa Kuzma is a counseling professor at Philadelphia College of the Bible. She spoke at our church’s women’s retreat, and her seminar was called “Learning From Anger.”

Talking about how squashing our anger is like killing the messenger, she tells a story about a messenger who brings bad news to a city, and when he approaches their gates a third time, they decide to kill him before he even gets to their walls. They don’t want to hear any more bad news. But the king was sending a message telling them there were enemies within the walls of the city, they are facing danger that is right in the midst of them. Lisa goes on to say “I think that’s what we do with our anger. It’s meant to be a messenger, telling us that there is trouble in our soul. But before it even gets a chance to speak to us, we kill it.”

She points out three messages our anger could be sending us: 1) We’ve been sinned against, 2) We’ve been hurt or disappointed, and 3) We have goals that are being blocked or we are trying to control things we can’t control. Read Tanya Marlow’s post “When Good Girls Get Angry,” and listen to your messenger. When you get angry, ask yourself, “Have I been sinned against?” Am I disappointed?” and “What am I trying to control?” If you would like to hear Lisa’s 3 part message on anger, email us at the address above.

Sexually Broken

The fact that sexual brokenness is bringing women here confirms our belief that we are incredibly susceptible to pornography, fantasy, masturbation, same-sex attraction, and sexual addiction, and this battle is raging in our minds, bodies, and spirits. We feel alone in our secrets, and ashamed and don’t know where to turn. We are longing for mentors and friends to walk alongside us. We are desperate for deliverance, but burdened with hopelessness. If this describes you or someone you love, check out Jessica Harris’s post “Hope and Healing for the Sexually Broken,” and the comments too. Please contact us at themudroomblog (at) gmail (dotcom) if you need some resources and recommendations. We are here for you.

Losing Our Faith

That’s been a popular theme. What one of us hasn’t questioned or doubted who God is, wondered what he wants from us, and asked ourselves, in the dark of a broken spirit, does he really love me? We’re not alone, but we feel it so keenly, that loneliness that comes from the need to seem together when inside we are feeling shattered and fearful. Read Tanya’s experience of her own loss in “When You Feel Like You’re Losing Your Faith.” It is such a privilege to share our words with you. We are blessed, enriched, and encouraged by your comments which are as deep and beautiful as the posts. Thank you. To end on a lighter note, here are the more humorous search terms we found. We actually thought about changing our blog name to the last one:

my friends are running away from me cause am boring
do brahmins have headstones
prettiest angry women
tanya hot blog.com
discovering the tucson landscape — ugly but honest
how to be a storm chaser for god?
never mess with a stranger
why sun is angry because of hot girls
girl you look beautiful in anger
why do beautiful and good girls get angry
the hardest people to date are pastors
angry hot girls blog
Tammy Perlmutter
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11 thoughts on “What Are We Searching For?

    • Thank you, Michele!! For years I lived in so much darkness and shame, terrified of telling people what was really going on in my heart and mind. When I started finding some healing, the Lord began prompting me to share more and more of my struggle. I felt sick at the thought of letting more people in, and sometimes God wanted me to share publicly! After agonizing over this “humiliating” calling, God told me that the very thing I am most ashamed of, the thing I want to hide the most, is the very thing he is going to use to bring himself the most glory. Who can argue with that? Apparently I can:)

  1. Jubilee 2000
    “Faith, therefore, is the substance of things waited for, the evidence of things not seen.” It is a most precious gift, and we know that and God knows that. @LatelaMary

  2. Thanks for sharing these, Tammy. This blog is really a great place to find help and healing and I’m so thankful you started it. You, my dear, are amazing! I have yet to write something for this blog, but thoughts have been swirling in my mind at times. I’ll just pray and be open to however God leads. xo

    • Thank you, Gayl!! I needed The Mudroom as much, if not more, as anyone else did! I am ecstatic that people find help and healing here, and that our vision for a safe place to be ourselves is becoming more of a reality every day. Thank you for your faithful presence here, Gayl!

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