Getting the Most Out of Regret

My top five regrets: Not dropping everything and going to the west coast when my sister’s husband was going through cancer treatment. Not being emotionally honest with friends for the first half of my life. Not traveling to a close friend’s destination wedding because it felt too expensive. Teasing a middle school classmate. Not getting […]

Revival Is Already Happening: An Interview with Carly Gelsinger

I’ve long appreciated Carly Gelsinger’s honesty about spiritual abuse and recovering from try-hard, never-enough Christianity. She wrote a memoir about her experience with radical faith, called Once You Go In, and I was eager to interview her. With so many revelations about abusive leaders coming out, I think it’s important we talk honestly about the appeal toxic […]

The Day I Avoided Foster Ministry

I really wanted to get excited with Martha. But instead, I felt panicky. At the playground with our kids, she was telling me about a powerful sermon she heard with her husband. “The preacher pointed out that if every Christian family in the US were to adopt, there would be no children in the foster […]

When I Rejected God’s Forgiveness

“Hi, I’m Miah, and I struggle with guilt and shame.” Sometimes restoration has to start at the very bottom of the muck. For as long as I could remember, I struggled with guilt and shame. This was probably a combination of perfectionism, fundamentalism, and a need to please others. Many days (and nights) were spent […]

The Weight of Perfection

Why is it so hard for us to accept responsibility? To be honest about our shortcomings and failures? Why is there so much shame around not being perfect? I kept thinking about that when the headline popped up in my Facebook news section. “Abby Wambach arrested for DUI”. And then she releases a statement. “I […]

Power and Preferential Treatment

I am not the biggest sports fan. But any Michigander worth their weight should be a Detroit fan. (Well, ok. I’m mostly a fair-weather Lions fan, but come on. It’s agony otherwise.) But a few years ago, I surprisingly turned into a fairly serious football fan. It started when I joined a fantasy football league, […]

I Switched Husbands

I got off the plane and in the car with 6 other women, perfect strangers. I was in Nebraska, a state I’d never been before nor expected to ever go. I was there as the keynote speaker for the women’s retreat, Jumping Tandem. Given the nature of my previous three years, keynoting was also unexpected. […]

Overcoming “Not Enoughness”

Several years ago, we asked thousands of people from all across the world to pray for a very sick newborn child. We hoped with all our hearts that God would perform a miracle. But when my best friend’s curly-headed baby boy died in her arms, she was launched into a season of incapacitating sorrow. God […]

Straining for the Light

For a long time the threat of a new year brought with it an onslaught of more darkness, more enervating melancholy, more long, gray days ahead to suffer through. It was nothing to celebrate.  At the end of one of those especially difficult years I met Alece Ronzino online. She too had experienced a year (or more!) like […]