Sex Matters

Sex matters.  Not simply how we have sex, but how and what we think about sex.  Figuring all of this out is seldom simple because the extremes views—represented by contemporary hook-up culture and purity movement—dominate the conversation even as they mislead us. The former advocates that we divorce the emotional/relational component from sex and use […]

Sexual Redemption in Community

Not many of us can find strength to resist temptation, perseverance in purity, and lasting forgiveness without community. Shepherds, teachers, mentors, leaders: You have people under your care who are engaging in self harm and dangerous behavior to externalize pain, and contemplating suicide to end pain because they are being crushed beneath suffering and sin. […]

The Regrets of a Middle-Aged Virgin

I’m a life-long singleton. I’ve been in love twice but never got as far a long-term relationship. The last time I kissed anyone with tenderness and passion was . . . well, a long time ago. I’m a middle-aged virgin. I remember the day I reluctantly confessed this to the practice nurse in my local […]

Keep the Lights On

Keep the lights off. Cover yourself up. Sex is for the girls that look like they just walked off the cover of a magazine. Be grateful for anyone who wants to touch you. Accept what you are given. These are all the lies that are told to me by the media, by people in passing […]

Sex as a Spiritual Practice?

I wish it wasn’t so easy to be sexually broken. For so many reasons we struggle to embrace our sexuality, don’t we? To give and receive fully. To engage our whole physical, emotional, and spiritual selves—and our partners do as well. On every level, sex gets messy. So there’s no better place to talk about […]

The Regrets of a Middle-Aged Virgin

I’m a life-long singleton. I’ve been in love twice but never got as far a long-term relationship. The last time I kissed anyone with tenderness and passion was . . . well, a long time ago. I’m a middle-aged virgin. I remember the day I reluctantly confessed this to the practice nurse in my local […]