Hope

When Your Birth is the Slow Kind

I have a book that I’ve been writing for a thousand years. (Are you really a thousand years old, you ask? Is that unnecessary hyperbole?) Oh, hush. I am. I must be, because I am quite sure that this book has taken me that long.  A thousand years, yesterday. That makes me a thousand and a day, today. […]

Emmanuel and Showing Up

The first few days of Advent, I felt irrationally angry. I tried to call it irritable or easily annoyed, but when I sat down to dig through it all what I found was anger. Advent is an invitation to the waiting, and frankly, I would like to decline. No thanks. Can’t come. Wish I could […]

The God Who Waits

Advent is a season of waiting: for calendar chocolates, promised presents, Santa’s steps.   Advent is a season of longing: for life, and light, and hope beyond this world.    In Advent, we think we are the ones who are waiting.    But I think of the annunciation, in Leonardo Da Vinci’s Italian colours:    […]

Endurance is Not Cold Tolerance

When I was a new mom, I read that children go through periods of equilibrium and disequilibrium that last about six months each. I kept hoping my daughter was nearing the end of a period of disequilibrium. After all, my sweet girl had been pushing all my buttons for months with expert grace, and she […]

Joy in a Minor Key

The holiday season is almost upon us, like a sweaty dog. The Christmas lights and jingly songs blare their good cheer into the darkness, but they don’t seem to penetrate it.  This year, we will decorate the tree together as a family, and I will try and snap pictures of my little boy looking angelic […]

Cast Off Your Chains

Cast off your chains, my friends, the ones that have been weighing you down. On the left wrist, the chain reads “try harder” on the right “do better.” Wrapped around both ankles is the chain of “you are not enough,” it is held together with the links reading: “should.” I should be thinking this, feeling […]

Surrendering to Communion

“Asking is, at its core, a collaboration.”                         Amanda Palmer, The Art of Asking It only took nine unsubscribes to undo me. I use some software to manage the subscribers to my blog, and if there’s activity—people signing up (yay!) people un-signing up (sigh!), I get an email. Lately, I […]

Dismantling Dark Emotions

I am one of those people that journal religiously. I have since I can remember. And I keep them (which is miraculous considering how much crap I throw away). I used to think that buying a new journal was like New Year’s Eve: A new chance at life. But now I’m learning that it doesn’t […]

Why I Dreaded My Dream Being Fulfilled

I thought they would be my knightesses in shining armor. A connection had led me to a small female–led company with promises of increasing my non-profit’s capacity. As the founder of a 5-year-old organization, I was relieved to hear that help might be tucked away in the basement of this little home-based business. I unloaded […]