Health

Faith Over Fear?

The church my husband and I were attending closed its doors at the beginning of the pandemic in 2020 and had done an admirable job of reaching out to congregants through a quick pivot to online technology for services and prayer meetings, phone calls from staff and leaders to check on members, and packets of […]

A Lost Heart Finds Home

I’m a very sensitive person, indeed, I’ve often been told I am too sensitive, over sensitive. That I feel things too deeply. I don’t believe that’s true or even makes sense. I am empathic and I see this as a good thing, even though it can be very painful. I can imagine how another person […]

Companions in the Darkness

Editor’s Note: Holding a conversation with Diana Gruver is like sitting in the sun: She radiates kindness and compassion in a way that makes you want to lean in and steal as many moments in her presence as possible. It may seem surprising, then, to hear her story—of how she, herself, “clawed toward the light” […]

Announcing our Fall Themes!!

We need your voices! This September, The Mudroom is launching a four-month series titled “Lost & Found: Stories of Belonging in a Bruised and Broken Body.” We desire to amplify the stories of those who’ve ever felt unseen, untethered, or set adrift from the Church—and those who have found or are finding, their way back. […]

The Tree Near the Side of the Road

I am learning about perspective in my oil painting class. Usually I rush into a painting, excited to get it started. But in this particular photograph of a tree near the side of road, my teacher encouraged me to keep proper perspective in the underpainting. To project accurate perspective, the elements must line up correctly […]

Osso Buco

I woke up from surgery, my throat sore from the ventilator, and I immediately reached to touch my face. I smiled. I gritted my teeth. I rubbed my nose. Gloriously I felt nothing. Not the familiar electric shocks or burning sensations that ultimately led me to let someone cut a hole in my head and […]

To Grieve and Grow

“I’m gonna need you to sing a little louder,” Paul said with a flirtatious grin. “Or I’ll have to move you closer so I can hear you.” He grabbed the sides of my chair and gently pulled me forward until my body filled the space between his long, bony legs. He softly picked the tune […]

Opening to a New Way to Bloom

Early in the healing process of a severe manic episode related to my bipolar disorder, I felt the nudge and a voice I believed to be God’s. I heard, “I want you to share your story. This story you are living now.” The only emotion I felt was terror. I quaked in my sneakers as […]

A Procedure for a Clean Heart

  I did not have any idea what to expect.   Anticipation of the unknown filled me with fear.   My body trembled uncontrollably. Unsure if the shivers were from the cold, metal table or from the overwhelming dread, a tear formed on my left cheek. The kind nurse wiped it away.   “It’s alright […]

Sacred Thresholds

Liminal space, where the kingdom of God somehow reaches us, calls out and touches us where we are. These thin places of sacred longing and knowing happen often in prayer, but we may also simply stumble upon them. This needn’t be on a windswept beach in the grey light of nearly dawn, they can hit […]

The Most Honest Thing

The magical, white fairy lights look almost friendly on this forest-dark night. There they are, wrapped around the cables swooping from one side of the rushing river to the other. And from those steel ropes hangs a suspension bridge—the bridge that stands between my little family and our cozy cabin on the far side of […]

Dr. Justina Ford Goes Higher

7,000 was the number of babies she brought into the world. 31 were the years she served the diverse community of east Denver—treating patients regardless of ethnicity, nationality, or ability to pay—offering resources and food for those who lacked them.1 She is reported to have said, “Folks make an appointment and whatever color they turn […]

Counterfeit

She is even better in person, I think. Better than The Crown. “For nearly 70 years I have kept a tradition of speaking to you at Christmas,” she begins—and we are captivated. She sits regal and poised behind the stately antique desk: a beacon of constancy and hope. An imposing yet festive Christmas tree shimmers […]

Hurting Yet Whole

Adaptation from Hurting Yet Whole: Reconciling Body and Spirit in Chronic Pain and Illness  by Liuan Huska Chapter 10, “A Community of Wounded Healers” We are not a few weeks post-Advent, but I am ready to repent and lament again. Call me melancholy, but Advent and Lent are my favorite seasons in the church calendar. […]

Happy, Happy Christmas?

Listen to Ingrid Michaelson’s “Happy, Happy Christmas” here. “Happy, Happy Christmas” There’s something about this time of the year It’s always so dark out and you’re never here But I hear the whispers inside of the snow Live well and let go Happy, happy Christmas Love the ones who love you (too) They say time […]

All That Remains

The two of them stand in the shadows—shoulder to shoulder, side by side. I gaze at their backsides, for their faces are fixed on the black and white images moving on the screen before them. I sense sadness in their shadows. I am very young, for as I reflect on the date it is November […]

Loosening My Grip

The klaxon sound of the motion detector alarm rouses me unceremoniously. My adrenaline is immediately pumping. I narrowly miss stepping on the dog in her little bed as I rush to get to mom’s bedroom. I need to reach her before she takes too many steps on her own. One night I didn’t make it […]

Untangled

My mom has a particular story about me that she likes to tell: As she was doing dishes in our kitchen, she looked out the window and saw me in the backyard trying to catch frogs and kiss them. While it’s rather cute to think of a porcelain-white toddler with black curls and thick baby […]